The subject of pride vs. self-esteem in the spiritual sense is something, in my personal experience, that is glossed over in many of our churches and Christian schools. Sure, if you straight-up asked someone if they valued mental health, of course, they would answer yes. The Bible not only calls us to love others, but also ourselves. But… sometimes I have noticed that the opposite is stressed much more, that is, the wickedness of being proud.
To start, I would like to show that I do understand that pride is and always will be the root of all sin; Adam and Eve ate the forbidden fruit because they wanted to be like God, the Tower of Babel was built so humans could reach the heavens, the Roman Empire took over so that they could rule the world. You and I both know I could go on for pages more, but the point is, I want to make clear that pride is the downfall of humanity. But, I don’t always believe pride and vanity to be interchangeable terms. For instance, when God created the heavens, the earth, and the rest of the universe, He was not being vain when stating that what He created was good. One can have pride in an achievement without being vain, and one can also tell others of such achievements without necessarily being boastful. This is the thing that I have always wished our schools and churches talked about more. In a world where insecurity and lack of self-confidence plague so many, sometimes the constant warning against pride is not what people need to hear.
Again, I’m not saying it’s bad to teach that vanity is sinful (remember, vanity vs. pride), but I think more discussion of self-esteem would be beneficial in our schools. It can be unhealthy for a child to grow up without this knowledge, and I know this personally. For a time, I lost sight of this, and it didn’t lead me into the happiest place. That was the time when I started to let people walk all over me, especially people who I called friends and even a best friend, but that’s besides the point. If anyone, but especially young, impressionable kids, is never taught the importance of self-love, standing up for themselves, and dignity, it can set them up for failure in their emotional, mental, and spiritual life.
Finally, I found a few Bible verses to think about regarding this subject: Matthew 22:39, Psalm 139:14, and 1 Corinthians 6:19. Firstly, Matthew 22:39 is the well-known “Love thy neighbor” verse, but the next two words are just as important too. “Love thy neighbor as thyself.” This shows we are not only called to love and respect others, but we also must do the same for ourselves. Learn to say, “no,” to people. It is not right for your neighbor to walk all over you with the excuse that you shouldn’t be vain and stand up for yourself. God doesn’t want your love only to extend to Him and other people; He wants you to love yourself, too. Secondly, Psalm 139:14 reads, “I will praise Thee, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvelous are Thy works, and that my soul knoweth right well.” This answers the question of why we are to have self-esteem. For the same reason we are to preserve and protect the Earth because it is God’s wonderful Creation, we also must view ourselves in a way that shows we are God’s Creation too. Not just everything and everyone else. Us too. God’s work in making us is marvelous, to put it simply. Also, in 1 Corinthians 6:19 it says, “What? Know ye not that your bodies are a temple of the Holy Ghost which is in you, which ye have of God, and ye are not your own?” This is yet another verse that highlights that we are God’s Creation and made in His image. What a wonderful thing this is!
In conclusion, to put it in short terms for you to remember easily, first, pride will always be the downfall of humanity. But second, pride and vanity are not always the same. Third, everyone should be taught the importance of self-esteem. And fourth, read the verses I mentioned about remembering to love yourself, and meditate on them. Even pray about them. As I’ve said, pride vs. self-esteem is not a subject that is talked about enough, and we need to fix that. Teach it in our schools. Preach it from our pulpits. But even if this never happens, if everyone continues teaching only one side of the story—the sinfulness of being proud—we will still always have means of knowing the truth. What are those means, you may ask? They are God’s teachings, found in His Word.
Written by Katherine Whiteley
Young Calvinists 